Question

7．假如你們學(xué)校校報(bào)舉行英語(yǔ)征文活動(dòng)，主題是"我心目中的成功人士"，請(qǐng)你寫一篇文章介紹一位你心目中的成功人士（可以使你身邊熟悉的人或名人）．文章必須包含以下內(nèi)容：
1．人物簡(jiǎn)介；
2．人物事跡；
3．給你的啟發(fā)．
要求：1）條理清楚，意思連貫，語(yǔ)句通順，標(biāo)點(diǎn)正確、邏輯清晰；
      2）假如寫的是你身邊的人物，文中不能呢個(gè)出現(xiàn)真實(shí)的姓名和校名；
      3）80詞左右．
Jim，one of my classmates，is a successful person in my mind．Jim does well in both his studies and sports．He has won a number of awards in many different competitions．What's more，he is helpful and gets on well with the classmates and teachers．However，Jim's success came through his day and night's hard work．From his experiences，I understand the meaning of"No pains，no gains．"And I will try my best to realize my dream．．

Answer 1

分析 這是一篇提綱作文．內(nèi)容是介紹一位心目中的成功人士．時(shí)態(tài)主要為一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)．人稱主要為第三人稱．
寫作思路：考生需要首先審清主題，圍繞主題展開作文．
其次考生可從以下幾個(gè)方面展開作文，即本文的寫作要點(diǎn)：
1．人物簡(jiǎn)介；
2．人物事跡；
3．給你的啟發(fā)．
常用到的重點(diǎn)短語(yǔ)：
do well in 擅長(zhǎng)于…
both…and…兩者都
what's more 更有甚者
get on with sb 與某人相處
however 然而
try one's best to do sth盡某人最大的努力做某事
高分句型：
Jim，one of my classmates，is a successful person in my mind．
本句中的one of my classmates是作為主語(yǔ)的同位語(yǔ)．
From his experiences，I understand the meaning of"No pains，no gains．"
句中"No pains，no gains．"諺語(yǔ)的應(yīng)用，不勞無(wú)獲的含義．

解答 A Successful Person in My Mind
       Jim，one of my classmates，is a successful person in my mind．（人物簡(jiǎn)介）（高分句型）Jim does well in both his studies and sports．He has won a number of awards in many different competitions．What's more，he is helpful and gets on well with the classmates and teachers．However，Jim's success came through his day and night's hard work．（事跡）From his experiences，I understand the meaning of"No pains，no gains．"（高分句型）And I will try my best to realize my dream．（啟發(fā)）

點(diǎn)評(píng) 用不同的句型以避免文章枯燥單調(diào)．要求語(yǔ)句通順，語(yǔ)法，詞匯，時(shí)態(tài)正確，書寫規(guī)范
這是一篇提綱作文．考生在把握了文章的中心后，應(yīng)在內(nèi)心構(gòu)思一個(gè)基本的框架，并考慮使用恰當(dāng)?shù)脑~語(yǔ)、短語(yǔ)和句型，以充分地表達(dá)文章的內(nèi)容．盡可能地充分利用所學(xué)的短語(yǔ)或句型來(lái)表述具體的內(nèi)容，避免使用無(wú)把握或偏、難句型．注意所寫句子要符合英語(yǔ)的表達(dá)習(xí)慣．