Question

15．Vivek opens up the window of his room and feels the fresh air of the morning．This is a very special day in his life．He is enjoying himself，recollecting all the efforts he has taken to see this day in his life．
Vivek，an engineering graduate，was rejected from selection 12times．After every attempt he learned something new about his personality and corrected his mistake．He believed that his failure was not defeat but an important step to achieving his goal．He prepared and practiced well and got through in his 13^th attempt （the number which everyone believes is unlucky）．Vivek has proved that there is nothing called luck but sincere effort is what takes one to success．
Vivek，from all his previous experience he had faced during the selection process，had taken it as a challenge to perform well during his training period．He believed in himself and completed his training in style．
Vivek wears white uniform and is ready for the Passing Out Parade．He has marched all his life to perform at the Indian Naval Academy．Vivek's parents are present to see their getting commissioned as an officer．They are also proud of their son for his achievement．
Now vivek marches up the stage to receive the Sword of Honor Award from the Naval Chief．Vivek's achievement is something really great and the whole crowd becomes delighted and excited when Vivek's story is narrated to the world．Vivek has given this moral（寓意）to the world：After every dark night there is bright sunlight．
[寫作內(nèi)容]
1．以約30個(gè)詞概括上文的主要內(nèi)容．
2．以約120詞就"堅(jiān)持與成功"這個(gè)主題談?wù)勀愕目捶ǎ瑑?nèi)容包括：
（1）堅(jiān)持與成功的關(guān)系；
（2）簡述你或者你周圍的人因?yàn)閳?jiān)持而最后取得成功的例子；
（3）如何才能做到堅(jiān)持下去．
[寫作要求]
1．在作文中可以使用自己親身的經(jīng)歷或虛構(gòu)的故事，也可以參照閱讀材料的內(nèi)容，但不得直接引用原文中的句子；
2．作文中不能出現(xiàn)真實(shí)姓名和學(xué)校名稱．
[評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)]
概括準(zhǔn)確，語言規(guī)范，內(nèi)容合適，篇章連貫．

Answer 1

分析 本文是一篇讀寫任務(wù)作文，根據(jù)所提供的材料信息，概括短文內(nèi)容，并以"堅(jiān)持與成功"為主題，寫出自己的看法．
寫作時(shí)，應(yīng)以第一人稱為主，時(shí)態(tài)為一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)，寫作要點(diǎn)：1．概括短文內(nèi)容；2．堅(jiān)持與成功的關(guān)系；3．舉例；4．如何做到堅(jiān)持下去．
重點(diǎn)短語：
get through（克服）in reality（事實(shí)上） be bound to（一定）  divide into（分為…）
高分句型：
1．Vivek had failed twelve times before he finally succeeded in gaining the admission into the Indian Navy Academy in his thirteenth attempt，which shows that perseverance and efforts can help get through all obstacles and pave the way to the final success．該句運(yùn)用高級詞匯及短語，并且運(yùn)用非限制性定語從句，屬于復(fù)雜長句．
2．In this hard struggle，some may submit to the difficulties，while others with strong willpower will persevere and my uncle is such an admirable person．
3．It is also advisable that we fulfill our dream by dividing it into small goals so that it may seem more accessible，which can help us persevere till the end．該句運(yùn)用非限制性定語從句．

解答 Vivek had failed twelve times before he finally succeeded in gaining the admission into the Indian Navy Academy in his thirteenth attempt，which shows that perseverance and efforts can help get through all obstacles and pave the way to the final success．（高分句型1）（概括短文內(nèi)容）
   In reality，no one can resist the sweet taste of success but success can hardly be achieved without perseverance．In this hard struggle，some may submit to the difficulties，while others with strong willpower will persevere and my uncle is such an admirable person．（高分句型2）（堅(jiān)持與成功的關(guān)系）
   My uncle had to walk for an hour to the town to receive his middle school education．In the first year，he had ten peers．In junior three，however，he had to cover the long distance alone because the other nine fellows quitted school for the great hardships．But my uncle persevered and didn't stop his pursuit of ideal and now he is a successful engineer．（舉例）
  We are bound to meet challenges on our life journey．But as long as we hold a dream that can greatly motivate us，we will move forward．It is also advisable that we fulfill our dream by dividing it into small goals so that it may seem more accessible，which can help us persevere till the end．（高分句型3）（堅(jiān)持下去的方法）

點(diǎn)評 讀寫任務(wù)作文在寫作時(shí)要注意內(nèi)容是否包含了所給要點(diǎn)，寫作時(shí)注意正確運(yùn)用時(shí)態(tài)，上下文意思連貫，符合邏輯關(guān)系，盡量使用自己熟悉的單詞，句式，同時(shí)也要注意使用高級詞匯使文章顯得更有檔次，平時(shí)需注意積累短語和重要句型．