Question

【題目】 假如你是李華，最近你在瀏覽一個(gè)新西蘭中學(xué)網(wǎng)站時(shí)，看到一位名叫Tom的中學(xué)生的留言，他計(jì)劃在暑假期間到中國(guó)的北京旅游，希望能有一名中國(guó)留學(xué)生做他的導(dǎo)游。你對(duì)此很感興趣，請(qǐng)根據(jù)以下要點(diǎn)提示寫一封e-mail給他，介紹你的相關(guān)情況。

主要內(nèi)容包括：

1．希望做他的導(dǎo)游；

2．打算如何給他做導(dǎo)游；

3．期盼他的回復(fù)。

注意：

1．詞數(shù)100左右；

2．可適當(dāng)增加情節(jié)，以使行文連貫；

3．信的開頭已為你寫好。

Dear Tom,

Recently, while browsing a senior high school website of New Zealand, I saw the message you posted on it．

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

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Yours sincerely,

Li Hua

Answer 1

【答案】

Dear Tom,

Recently, while browsing a senior high school website of New Zealand, I saw the message you posted on it．I get to know your wishes that you intend to travel in Beijing during the summer vacation with a Chinese student as your guide．

Learning this news, I am really willing to travel with you and introduce Beijing to you．I know as a brilliant guide I am supposed to make your journey interesting and meaningful．For one thing, I will keep you company visiting numerous great places of interest and enjoying the wonderful sightseeing．For another, I am going to tell you the long and rich history of Beijing．

I am looking forward to the reply from you．With all my wishes you could give me this honor．

Yours sincerely,

Li Hua

【解析】

試題分析：本次作文為提綱作文。寫作要點(diǎn)為：1.希望做他的導(dǎo)游；2．打算如何給他做導(dǎo)游；3．期盼他的回復(fù)。應(yīng)注意不同時(shí)態(tài)的正確使用、表述的層次感、詞語(yǔ)的運(yùn)用及句子的銜接。

寫作亮點(diǎn)：該范文要點(diǎn)全面，采用三段式結(jié)構(gòu)清晰、重點(diǎn)突出。使用For one thing, 及For another讓文章層次感強(qiáng)。非謂語(yǔ)“while browsing a senior high school website of New Zealand”, “Learning this news”,“ visiting numerous great places of interest and enjoying the wonderful sightseeing”；定語(yǔ)從句“I saw the message you posted on it．”同位語(yǔ)從句“I get to know your wishes that you intend to travel in Beijing during the summer vacation with a Chinese student as your guide．”的使用，提升了文章的檔次，為文章增色不少！