Question

1．假設(shè)你是李華，你于2017年3月26號購買了一部iPhone 7手機(jī)，因有質(zhì)量問題，要求該商店退換．請根據(jù)下列要點(diǎn)，用英文給該店經(jīng)理寫一封投訴信．
要點(diǎn)：（1）問題：手機(jī)無法上網(wǎng)，不能視頻聊天；店內(nèi)暫無配件，需等一個(gè)月才能修好．
（2）要求：公司應(yīng)盡快予以更換或退款．
注意：（1）詞數(shù)100左右．
（2）開頭和結(jié)尾已為你寫好，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)．
參考詞匯：配件 spare part
Dear Sir，
I am writing to you for the iPhone 7 I bought on 26th of March，2017 at your shop．After I took it home and used it for a while，I found there was something wrong with it．I couldn't go online with the phone，nor could I use video chat to communicate with my friends．（高分句型一）Then I took it to your shop，only to be told that it was a new model and there were no right spare parts in the shop．（高分句型二）And also the shop assistant told me it would take a month before the phone was repaired．So I was so desperate on hearing that．How can I wait that long？Therefore，I require that you change a new one for me or give my money back as soon as possible．（高分句型三）
Thank you for your consideration．
 
Yours sincerely，
Li Hua

Answer 1

分析 本篇書面表達(dá)屬于提綱類作文，根據(jù)提示信息你于2017年3月26號購買了一部iPhone 7手機(jī)，因有質(zhì)量問題，要求該商店退換．請根據(jù)下列要點(diǎn)，用英文給該店經(jīng)理寫一封投訴信，寫作時(shí)注意以下幾點(diǎn)：1、仔細(xì)閱讀有關(guān)提示，弄清試題提供的所有信息，明確幾個(gè)要點(diǎn)：：（1）問題：手機(jī)無法上網(wǎng)，不能視頻聊天；店內(nèi)暫無配件，需等一個(gè)月才能修好．（2）要求：公司應(yīng)盡快予以更換或退款． 2、提綱是文章的總體框架，要在提綱的范圍內(nèi)進(jìn)行分析、構(gòu)思和想象．要依據(jù)提示情景或詞語，按照一定邏輯關(guān)系來寫．本文寫作時(shí)可以按照要點(diǎn)所給的順序?qū)懀?、根據(jù)要表達(dá)的內(nèi)容確定句子的時(shí)態(tài)、語態(tài)；就本文而言應(yīng)該用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)態(tài)．4．注意使用高級詞匯和句式，以增加文章的亮點(diǎn)．
【亮點(diǎn)說明】本文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊，層次分明，而且使用了多種表達(dá)：for a while一會兒；go online上網(wǎng)；communicate with與…交流；Therefore因此；as soon as possible盡快
I couldn't go online with the phone，nor could I use video chat to communicate with my friends．（高分句型一）
Then I took it to your shop，only to be told that it was a new model and there were no right spare parts in the shop．（高分句型二）
Therefore，I require that you change a new one for me or give my money back as soon as possible．（高分句型三）

解答 Dear Sir，
       I am writing to you for the iPhone 7 I bought on 26th of March，2017 at your shop．After I took it home and used it for a while，I found there was something wrong with it．I couldn't go online with the phone，nor could I use video chat to communicate with my friends．（高分句型一）Then I took it to your shop，only to be told that it was a new model and there were no right spare parts in the shop．（高分句型二）And also the shop assistant told me it would take a month before the phone was repaired．So I was so desperate on hearing that．How can I wait that long？Therefore，I require that you change a new one for me or give my money back as soon as possible．（高分句型三）
      Thank you for your consideration．
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Yours sincerely，
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Li Hua

點(diǎn)評 英語寫作是一項(xiàng)主觀性較強(qiáng)的測試題．它不僅考查學(xué)生的寫作基礎(chǔ)而且還考查學(xué)生在寫作過程中綜合運(yùn)用語言的能力．在撰寫時(shí)要注意主謂語一致，時(shí)態(tài)呼應(yīng)，用詞貼切等．要提高英語寫作水平，需要兩方面的訓(xùn)練：一是語言基礎(chǔ)方面的訓(xùn)練，要有扎實(shí)的造句、翻譯等基本功，即用詞法、句法等知識造出正確無誤的句子；二是寫作知識和能力 方面的訓(xùn)練以掌握寫作方面的基本方法和技巧．