Question

【題目】【2013年江西】母愛(ài)情深，母愛(ài)無(wú)價(jià)；學(xué)會(huì)感恩，學(xué)會(huì)回報(bào)。某英語(yǔ)網(wǎng)站舉辦以“My mother”為題的英語(yǔ)征文活動(dòng)。請(qǐng)你根據(jù)下列思維導(dǎo)圖提供的信息，寫(xiě)一篇短文，介紹自己的母親和你們的真情故事。

提示：1.短文應(yīng)包括導(dǎo)圖中的全部信息，條理清楚，行文連貫，段落分明;

2.短文中不能出現(xiàn)真實(shí)的人名和地名。

3.詞數(shù)不少于80，開(kāi)頭已給出:不計(jì)人總詞數(shù)。

My mother

We need love. We also need to love. The person I love most is my mother.

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Answer 1

【答案】

My mother

We need love. We also need to love. The person I love most is my mother. My mother is 41 years old. She is of medium build with long black hair. Shi is quiet. She is a history teacher in a middle school. She likes dancing. She can cook delicious food.

She did a lot for me when I was a child. She bought whatever I needed for my study, even though she didn’t have much money. She sent me from piano lessons to dancing lessons at the weekend. She cooked delicious and healthy food for me.

When I grow up, I will do what I can to make my mother happy. I will find a good job after I graduate from college. I’ll save money and buy beautiful clothes that make her look still young. I’ll take her to wonderful sights around China. Most importantly, I will stay with her when I have free time. That’s what she wants most, I think.

【解析】

試題分析：這是一篇給材料作文，短文的開(kāi)頭已經(jīng)給出.本作文中給出的要點(diǎn)比較簡(jiǎn)略,動(dòng)筆前先要圍繞這些要點(diǎn)阻止材料，確定寫(xiě)作內(nèi)容，注意將這些要點(diǎn)全部表達(dá)出來(lái)，不要偏離文章中心.寫(xiě)作時(shí)注意準(zhǔn)確運(yùn)用時(shí)態(tài)，上下文意思連貫，符合邏輯關(guān)系，一定要契合文章要表達(dá)的主題,不能出現(xiàn)文章脫節(jié)問(wèn)題.盡量使用自己熟悉的單詞句式，同時(shí)也要注意使用高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句型使文章顯得更有檔次。

【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】該短文能夠正確運(yùn)用時(shí)態(tài)：介紹媽媽的一般情況用了一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)，介紹媽媽為自己所做的事情，用了過(guò)去時(shí)態(tài)，對(duì)將來(lái)要為媽媽做的事情，用了將來(lái)時(shí)。同時(shí)運(yùn)用了大量的短語(yǔ)和復(fù)合句，如：定語(yǔ)從句The person I love most is my mother，及I’ll save money and buy beautiful clothes that make her look still young.狀語(yǔ)從句She bought whatever I needed for my study, even though she didn’t have much money.時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句When I grow up, I will do what I can to make my mother happy.，等，為文章增色。