Question

 請(qǐng)以“One Thing I’m Proud of”為題，用英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)一篇100—120個(gè)詞的短文，記述一件你自己認(rèn)為得意的事情。要求如下：
1. 記述事情經(jīng)過(guò)；
2. 簡(jiǎn)要說(shuō)明你感到得意的原因或從中得到的啟示。
注意：文章的標(biāo)題已給出（不計(jì)詞數(shù)）。
One Thing I’m Proud of

Answer 1

One possible version：
One Thing I’m Proud of
I still remember how I became a good table tennis player.
The first day I went to high school, I saw some of my classmates playing table tennis. Amazed at how skillful they were, I was determined to be just as good. Later on, I often watched them carefully to learn their techniques. Then I kept practicing until I became confident enough to challenge the good players. At the end of the term I became one of the best players in my class.
I am really proud of this experience, because it helps me realize that we all can fulfill our potential and achieve our goals through hard work. It also helps me better understand the proverb “Practice makes perfect”.
Li Yue

試題分析：本文是提綱類(lèi)作文，要求以“One Thing I’m Proud of”為題，寫(xiě)一篇100—120個(gè)詞的短文，記述一件你自己認(rèn)為得意的事情。通過(guò)審題可知此篇書(shū)面表達(dá)應(yīng)寫(xiě)成記敘文，寫(xiě)自己經(jīng)歷的事情和得到的啟發(fā)，學(xué)生們對(duì)此都會(huì)有話(huà)可說(shuō)，只要做適當(dāng)?shù)陌l(fā)揮即可。因?yàn)槭怯洈⒆约旱慕?jīng)歷，所以文章要使用一般過(guò)去時(shí)，在寫(xiě)作的過(guò)程中，要力求語(yǔ)言簡(jiǎn)練，而且為了文章內(nèi)容上的銜接和層次的清晰，要使用合適的連接詞如：First，second， Besides, What’s more等，讓文章看起來(lái)?xiàng)l理性更強(qiáng)。同時(shí)還要注意使用高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句型，如強(qiáng)調(diào)句，倒裝句等，以提高文章的檔次。
【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】本篇書(shū)面表達(dá)要點(diǎn)全面，語(yǔ)言簡(jiǎn)練流暢，時(shí)態(tài)、人稱(chēng)和標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)使用正確，很好的完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。在作文中作者開(kāi)門(mén)見(jiàn)山提出自己想要寫(xiě)的事情，然后詳細(xì)記敘當(dāng)時(shí)的情況。最后表明了自己對(duì)這件事的認(rèn)識(shí)和想法。在文中作者使用的Later on, Then，At the end of等詞匯清楚地表明了事情的發(fā)展過(guò)程，給人一種脈絡(luò)清晰的感覺(jué)。此外文中高級(jí)詞匯和短語(yǔ)fulfill our potential，achieve our goals和諺語(yǔ)“Practice makes perfect”.的使用都成為了文章的亮點(diǎn)所在。