Question

6．閱讀下面短文，然后按要求寫一篇150詞左右的英語短文．
Once upon a time in a land far away，there was a wonderful old man who loved everything：animals，spiders，insects…
One day while walking through the woods the nice old man found a cocoon（繭）of a butterfly．He took it home．A few days later，a small opening appeared； he sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole．Then it seemed to stop making any progress．It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther．
Then the man decided to help the butterfly，so he took a pair of scissors and cut off the remaining bit of the cocoon．
The butterfly then came out with ease．
But it had a swollen body and small，shriveled（萎縮的）wings．The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that，at any moment，the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body．Neither happened!In fact，the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings．It never was able to fly．
What the kind-hearted man did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were Nature's way of forcing fluid（液體）from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon．
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life．If we were allowed to go through our life without any hardships，it would fail us．We would not be as strong as what we could have been．And we could never fly．
寫作內(nèi)容
1．以約30個詞概括上文的主要內(nèi)容．
2．以約120個詞就"個人成長需要艱難生活的磨礪"的主題發(fā)表看法，至少包含以下內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)：
（1）你讀了這個故事的感受；
（2）敘述當(dāng)前父母溺愛子女的現(xiàn)象和由此造成的后果；
（3）假如你是父母的一方，你會如何磨礪自己的孩子？
寫作要求
1．你可以使用實例或其他論述方法支持你的觀點(diǎn)，也可以參照閱讀材料的內(nèi)容，但不得直接引用原文中的句子．
2．作文中不能出現(xiàn)真實姓名和學(xué)校名稱．
評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)
概括準(zhǔn)確，語言規(guī)范，內(nèi)容合適，語篇連貫．
A kind man cut a cocoon open in order to lessen the pain of a butterfly when he saw it struggling out of the cocoon，only to find that it could never fly because of his help．
The story sets me thinking．Our life is more or less like this．Sometimes，struggles or obstacles in our life are a must for our growth．It is these struggles or obstacles that increase our willpower and contribute to our success．Without these trials，we could never achieve our life goal just as the butterfly did in the story．
Nowadays，with only one child in most families，parents do whatever they can to satisfy the child's needs and even do for him what should be done by himself．Consequently，the child is unable to look after himself without his parents'presence．Too much care from parents deprives children of chances to grow strong by conquering obstacles．
　 If I were a parent，I would first keep him well informed that life is never easy and that he should be ready to face any difficulties．Besides，I would expose him to the hardships in life instead of protecting him from difficulties，providing them with chances to fight for his bright future by conquering challenges．．

Answer 1

分析 本文是讀寫任務(wù)型寫作，這類作文可按照三段式模板寫：第一段：概況所給短文要點(diǎn)．第二段：過渡詞引出主題句---闡述理由．第三段：個人觀點(diǎn)．特別要注意第一段的概括．用自己的語言概括，不能照搬照抄原文． 時態(tài)用一般現(xiàn)在時．人稱用第一和第三人稱． 重要短語：in order to （為了），lessen the pain（減輕痛苦），sets sb thinking（讓某人思考），more or less（或多或少），achieve one's life goal （實現(xiàn)某人的目標(biāo)），satisfy one's needs （滿足某人需要），look after （照顧），deprive sb of…（剝奪某人某物），keep sb well informed（使…被通知，告訴），be ready to do（樂意做某事），face any difficulties （面對任何挑戰(zhàn)），expose sb to…（使某人接觸，體驗），instead of （相反），protect sb from…（保護(hù)某人免受…），fight for （為…而戰(zhàn)），conquer challenges（征服挑戰(zhàn)）．
【高分句型一】
1．A kind man cut a cocoon open in order to lessen the pain of a butterfly when he saw it struggling out of the cocoon，only to find that it could never fly because of his help．此處是由動詞不定式"only to do"作結(jié)果狀語，表意料之外的結(jié)果，主句為"A kind man cut a cocoon open in order to lessen the pain of a butterfly when he saw it struggling out of the cocoon"．
【高分句型二】
1．It is these struggles or obstacles that increase our willpower and contribute to our success．
此處是強(qiáng)調(diào)句型，結(jié)構(gòu)為"It+is/was+強(qiáng)調(diào)部分+that+…"，如果去掉強(qiáng)調(diào)句型的骨架"It was/is …that"，原句句子成分齊全，句意通順．
【高分句型三】
2．If I were a parent，I would first keep him well informed that life is never easy and that he should be ready to face any difficulties．
此處是虛擬語氣在"if"條件狀語從句中的用法，表示對現(xiàn)在情況的虛擬，從句中謂語動詞用"were/過去式"，主句中謂語動詞用"would/could/might/+動詞原形"．
【高分句型四】
4．I would expose him to the hardships in life instead of protecting him from difficulties，providing them with chances to fight for his bright future by conquering challenges．
此處是由現(xiàn)在分詞短語"providing"作伴隨狀語，主句為"Only+【狀語成分：介詞短語/when、if引導(dǎo)的從句/時間副詞】+一般疑問句形式"，主句的主語"I"與所給動詞"provide"構(gòu)成邏輯上的主動關(guān)系．

解答 A kind man cut a cocoon open in order to lessen the pain of a butterfly when he saw it struggling out of the cocoon，only to find that it could never fly because of his help．【高分句型一】（概括）
The story sets me thinking．Our life is more or less like this．Sometimes，struggles or obstacles in our life are a must for our growth．It is these struggles or obstacles that increase our willpower and contribute to our success．【高分句型二】Without these trials，we could never achieve our life goal just as the butterfly did in the story．（讀了這個故事的感受）
Nowadays，with only one child in most families，parents do whatever they can to satisfy the child's needs and even do for him what should be done by himself．Consequently，the child is unable to look after himself without his parents'presence．Too much care from parents deprives children of chances to grow strong by conquering obstacles．（敘述當(dāng)前父母溺愛子女的現(xiàn)象和由此造成的后果）
　 If I were a parent，I would first keep him well informed that life is never easy and that he should be ready to face any difficulties．【高分句型三】Besides，I would expose him to the hardships in life instead of protecting him from difficulties，providing them with chances to fight for his bright future by conquering challenges．【高分句型四】
（個人觀點(diǎn)：作為一個父母，如何磨礪自己的孩子）

點(diǎn)評 讀寫任務(wù)型寫作是將閱讀與寫作有機(jī)結(jié)合，要求考生既能讀懂文章信息，又要依據(jù)要求規(guī)范連貫地表達(dá)內(nèi)容，其中準(zhǔn)確概括很有挑戰(zhàn)且十分重要，根據(jù)記敘文、議論文、說明文等不同文體作相應(yīng)概括，總的來說，遵循以下步驟：確定主題句；尋找關(guān)鍵詞；重構(gòu)主題句；重組支持句．寫作時注意準(zhǔn)確運(yùn)用時態(tài)，上下文意思連貫，符合邏輯關(guān)系，盡量使用自己熟悉的單詞句式，同時也要注意使用高級詞匯和高級句型使文章顯得更有檔次，平時需注意積累短語和重要句型．