Question

假如你是李華，你的好友張帆迷上了網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲，正好你們學(xué)校下周六將組織一次主題為“如何正確使用網(wǎng)絡(luò)” 的活動(dòng)，屆時(shí)一位教授將做有關(guān)方面報(bào)告。請(qǐng)給張帆寫(xiě)封郵件
內(nèi)容包括：1. 描述活動(dòng)的目的，形式及過(guò)程并邀請(qǐng)請(qǐng)他來(lái)參加這次活動(dòng)。
2.談?wù)勀銓?duì)他的建議和希望。
字?jǐn)?shù)：120 左右 網(wǎng)癮 the Internet addiction

Answer 1

0ne possible version：
Dear ZhangFan,
I’m sorry to hear that you have become addicted to the Internet games. I know you are eager to give it up.luckily,It happens that next Saturday our school will hold an event aiming at helping students fight the Internet addiction. An expert will be invited to give us a speech on how to make good use of the Internet.I think it will be of help to you . If you can come and attend it, I will be happy.
At the same time, as for your addiction,I will give you some suggestions.For one thing,It’s better for you to do some outdoor activities,which can keep your attention off the Internet.For another thing,You can try to make friends with your classmates,by communicating frequently with them,you may forget the Internet.
I hope you can take my suggestions seriously. And get rid of the Internet games.
Yours
LiHua

解析試題分析：本篇書(shū)面表達(dá)要求寫(xiě)一封郵件，邀請(qǐng)迷戀上網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲的朋友張帆來(lái)參加你們學(xué)校下周六將組織一次主題為“如何正確使用網(wǎng)絡(luò)” 的活動(dòng)，因?yàn)閷脮r(shí)一位教授將做有關(guān)方面報(bào)告，而且在郵件中還要提出建議和對(duì)他的希望。從要求可以看出本文應(yīng)該用第一人稱(chēng)，使用將來(lái)時(shí)態(tài)。寫(xiě)電子郵件時(shí)語(yǔ)言要自然，提出的建議要中肯，語(yǔ)氣要委婉。這部分要適當(dāng)?shù)剡M(jìn)行發(fā)揮想象，比如可以多參加學(xué)�；顒�(dòng)來(lái)減少對(duì)網(wǎng)絡(luò)的迷戀，要有耐心和毅力去戒掉網(wǎng)癮等等。在寫(xiě)作時(shí)候還要盡量使用高級(jí)詞匯和多種句式，為了使行文流暢還要恰當(dāng)使用連接詞和過(guò)渡句等。
【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】本篇范文要點(diǎn)全面，語(yǔ)言簡(jiǎn)潔流暢，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，層次分明。作者在謀篇布局時(shí)使用了經(jīng)典的三段式結(jié)構(gòu)，開(kāi)頭提出寫(xiě)信的目的，也就是發(fā)出邀請(qǐng)；第二段提出了一些建議；最后提出了自己對(duì)他的希望。在文中作者使用了大量短語(yǔ)比如 become addicted to , be eager to , aim at ,give a speech ,  keep sth off ,communicate with ，take sth seriously, make good use of 等等，顯示了作者詞匯的豐富。此外，作者還用到了for one thing ，for another thing來(lái)連接句子，提高了作文的檔次，
考點(diǎn)：考查提綱作文