分析 本文講述的是李華要成為志愿者所寫的申請書.屬于半開放性作文,使用的時態(tài)以一般現(xiàn)在時為主,使用第一人稱.在自我介紹的時候,考生可以用自己或者身邊一個有顯著特點的人作為原型.在寫作時,要選擇自己熟悉的短語或者句型,在你的能力范圍之內(nèi),選擇句式時要賦予變化,因為這樣你才可以更好的駕馭.同時也要選擇合適的連接詞,把各個要點組織成一個完整的整體,如besides,further,last but not least等
【亮點說明】本文中的高級句式使用較好,如I would appreciate it very much if I could be given the chance.中的I would appreciate it….;詞匯的運用也很到位:apply for,look forward to等等;關(guān)聯(lián)詞的使用很合理如:What's more,On the other side.等等.
解答 Dear Mr.Steven,
I'm Li Hua from China and I'm writing to you to apply for the job as a volunteer for the coming London Olympic Games.(高分句型)
I'm a friendly and helpful boy/girl,and I'm active in taking part in volunteer activities.There will be less language difficulty for me because English is my favorite subject and I'm quite good at it.What's more.I'll graduate from senior high this summer and I'll have proper time to work for the Olympics.(高分句型)
I'm crazy about sports and if I can get the opportunity,I'll try my best to serve for the Olympics.On the other side.I'm sure that I can benefit a lot from the volunteering job,such as making new friends,improving my communication skills and my oral English level.(高分句型) I'would appreciate it very much if I could be given the chance.(高分句型)
l'm looking forward to your early reply!
Yours sincerely,
Li Hua
點評 應(yīng)該注意適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)以使行文連貫,比如適當(dāng)選用表示因果、遞進(jìn)、轉(zhuǎn)折關(guān)系的連接詞,使文章流暢、通順,并避免因反復(fù)使用句式相同的簡單句而造成的單調(diào)感.(1)認(rèn)真審題,確定體裁. (2)構(gòu)思要點.根據(jù)題目要求,理解要表達(dá)的要點.設(shè)計好文章的層次段落,考慮所用時態(tài)、人稱等,把要點串聯(lián)起來,構(gòu)成文章框架.(3)選詞造句,避難選易.(4)認(rèn)真檢查,避免錯誤.仔細(xì)閱讀全文,查找是否有錯,注意時態(tài)、單詞拼寫、字母大小寫、標(biāo)點是否有誤,句式是否正確.邏輯是否一致.
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